“Cat on a hot tin roof”
EXT. AFTERNOON.
The upper wraparound gallery of the house of BIG DADDY POLLITT, an aging magnate. There are two sets of doors that give access to the gallery.
MAGGIE THE CATa beautiful young woman with unwrinkled forehead casually closes the doors as she inspects the afternoon sky.
MAGGIE: Brick, I'm closing the doors now that Big Daddy has turned on the central air conditioning. We're not paying to cool the entire Mississippi Delta.
STONE: I have uncomplicated feelings about your fertility and have been drinking unadulterated iced tea all afternoon.
BIG DAD: I have cancer. Hot enough for you?
BIG MOTHER: As the indoor temperature remains steady at seventy-two degrees, I can handle troubling news with equanimity.
STONE: After an appropriate amount of time has passed and I have responded appropriately to this information, I plan to have penetrative sex with my wife, as is my custom. This in no way diminishes the importance of my previous romantic relationship with Skipper, a man whose death was not my fault. I can honor Skipper and love Maggie at the same time.
GOOPER: It's pleasantly cool inside and I accept your bisexuality as an intrinsic part of your identity, Brick. Let us divide our inheritance equally. Better yet, let us not assume that we have any right to our parents' property because of the lottery of our births.
MAGGIE: It's not too hot for conventional morality!
BIG DAD: I don't have to roll up my sleeves to the elbow to keep cool, nor do I have to exercise my last will and testament like a club to command obedience.
MAE: It's cool enough to distinguish between truth and falsehood. I see things as they are, with a clear eye. I have had several children; this is a simple fact.
MAGGIE: Maggie the Cat is no more or less alive than any other member of this family.
STONE: I think I'll have another regular iced tea.
[A thoughtful pause.]
STONE: On second thought, I've already had three iced teas today. I'm approaching diminishing returns and instead have nothing.
BIG DAD: Let us all have nothing.
'A tram called desire'
STANLEY: Thanks to the rapid evaporation, my T-shirt smells as fresh and fresh tonight as it did when I first put it on.
STELLA: Even though I don't contribute financially to this household, I am still your partner and your equal.
BLANCHE: I would like to ask permission to stay with you, in your moderate home, and also to respect the primacy of your relationship with your husband, whose Polish background I highly respect.
STANLEY: In such a small, well-cooled apartment you don't have to sweat or shout. I can be heard across the room without raising my voice. See, I created a chore wheel for the three of us so we can all have clear expectations of each other.
BLANCHE: Thanks for the job, Stanley. What you lack in raw sexual charisma, you more than make up for with artfully expressed boundaries. Speaking of raw sexual charisma and artfully expressed boundaries, I have never treated any of my students with anything less than the strictest professionalism and respect.
STANLEY: Would you like to have an iced tea, or discuss your mental health in a frank and open way with people who support you?
BLANCHE: I want both, thank you. The SEER appreciation in the kitchen is excellent and conducive to discussions about emotional health.
STELLA: Let us give thanks for the groundbreaking work of Willis Carrier, not to mention the contributions of Stuart W. Cramer, Michael Faraday, and John Hadley.
STANLEY: I'll add that to the chore wheel.
“Suddenly, last summer”
SEBASTIAN VENABLE: Last summer, the ambient temperature in the sitting room was comfortable for all of my overnight guests, each of whom was a consenting adult with a robust, safe sexual identity.
“The Glass Menagerie”
JIM: I'm engaged, but looking forward to getting to know Laura as a person and developing a platonic friendship, appropriately contextualized.
LAURA: I'm setting the thermostat to seventy-two, Mother.
AMANDA: What a reasonable temperature. Tom, while I encourage you to chew your food slowly, I recognize that as an adult you have to make your own choices, and I trust that you will act in your best interest.
[Distantly, the air-conditioner whirs to life.]
TOM: I will honor that trust. Nor will I take off my coat, because it is not necessary; the dining room is extremely comfortable tonight.
LAURA: The horn of my little glass unicorn broke off. Glass figurines, like dreams, are fragile, but that doesn't mean they aren't worth cherishing.
[Jim texts his fiancée briefly, then returns his full attention to the dinner party.]
TOM: I have a two-drink limit that I have no problem sticking to as I rarely dehydrate in this controlled climate.
AMANDA: Your father was much the same. He also liked to drink in moderation.
LAURA: Let's all enjoy drinking in moderation and celebrating our different approaches to life, with none canceling out the other. [She glances down.] It seems I was wrong. My glass unicorn isn't broken at all. Nothing is broken.
AMANDA: How nice.
TOM: Yes, how very nice.
[Slow fade to black.]
