Questions I sent my dad, in ascending order of how disappointed he was to receive them

What is the difference between a 401(k) and a Roth IRA?

How Much Advil and Tylenol Can I Take at the Same Time?

My landlord should provide hot water, right?

Is it bad that I don't worry about debt?

Glad to see you! Can you still pick me up from the train station? I should be in around 3:15 PM BEN

Can I void a check by simply tearing it up?

What does “expired extended warranty” mean? And why do these calls keep insisting that I have a car?

It's okay to eat a little fungus, right?

In what year was mother born? By the way, what year were you born? Doing some astrological things.

Can you send me Aunt Kathy's cell number?

Can you send me grandma's mobile number?

Can you send me my mobile number? Paranoid, I'm wrong.

Will you be there in three Fridays to sign a package? Happy Father's Day too! Sorry your gift arrived a little late.

Does this look like ringworm?

Will it be a problem if a little Dijon gets spilled on my tax forms?

You're still driving to my improv show next month, right? Theme is 'Jane Fonda on the moon'.

Have you changed the password of our Disney+ account? My ex-boyfriend tries to use it but can't get into it.

Is it bad that I told the Walgreens cashier my social security number?

Hi, sorry for the message via Facebook. What is the information about our Verizon family plan? Dropped phone in a French press.

Is the market really that terrible? A guy on the subway said he knew of a deal on some cheap land in far northern Maine, and I think I could invest. He also invited me to visit the country with him this weekend, which is a nice offer, right?

If I ate way too many weed cookies, should I theoretically go to the hospital? Also happy birthday!!!


More humor

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